Christian perspective on dating after divorce

The closer each spouse gets to God the closer and the two will come. Jan 6, 7. All I can say is that I have a son that probably would be more happy if he had both his parents around him every day, and I didn't wait till marriage. Actually there never were any marriage, and never will be with the person I didn't wait with. I don't think it is just a matter of keeping sex inside of the marriage, just for the sake of keeping it there. I think there is meanings behind it that maybe God see more clearly then us sometimes. Jan 6, 8.

It seems that community laws and Christian laws are being combined sometimes, maybe here too? We as Christians are bound by laws of the state. And in that case, we are to subject ourselves for discipline for breaking the law. Our community is supposed to be important to us as Christians. The current law allows for this woman to be divorced from her husband. Even long ago, Moses knew men and their hearts and knew they would not be able to follow rules that go against their true nature, so the law was changed.


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I think I'm right about how I said that. Now, about the sex before second marriage - it seems pretty straight forward. Though the writings we read refer to perfectly setup situations, and we wonder if second marriages have different rules, - My combined Bible Study experience tells me sex before second marriage isn't okay - if it was important to abstain before, and the first marriage is now erased; then the second marriage is going to be approached as a first marriage, with all the same rules applying.

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Well, even if you don't think of it that way - you must agree to some point or you wouldn't be here asking opinions. I have been in a similar situation as you. I didn't always do the right thing, I know about a husband with bedroom issues. I understand the desire to make sure it does plague your marriage.

I do I do I understand. Some Christians I know sin, then ask for forgiveness - they take this approach to many things. I think it's dangerous. I think a great gift is received sometime down the road when we - through faith - can walk the narrow path.

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Think of what is received for your success, in abstaining, surely this is what God is wanting for you. I also feel that the focus of sex in this current day, is dangerous to us and our decisions as Christians. I'll just bet you feel kind of silly or freaky about approaching the issue of being whatever age your are I'm 50 btw and abstaining from sex until you are married again. It's not a typical thing to hear in this culture, now is it?

But if you think it through, it's important to be that Christian and to follow Chrisitan advise taught through the Bible. I don't for one minute believe that what you do or don't do will earn you salvation - only Christ can grace us with salvation - but I think our natural inclinations are dangerous to our relationship with Christ. Like x 2 List. Jan 7, 9. It comes under "sexual immorality" sin. I'll post some verses below. But "test driving" is not necessary when we ask God to send our match.

We have to ask Him to bring a perfect match to us. He wouldn't give us somebody we couldn't stand in that way. Also, since "test driving" is sin, it would be equivalent as "selling your soul for a pot of porridge" ACT All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.

Jan 7, I want to respectfully disagree with Elijah2. You make it sound like adultery and fornication are unforgiveable sins. We know from Scripture that there is only one unforgiveable sin, blasphemy of the Holy Spirit. As long as someone who has committed adultery or fornication repents, they can be forgiven and it will be washed under the blood.

Thank you all who responded. I agree with those that said that adultery freed me from my marriage covenant. I was under complete pastoral care while all this was going on and while we exhausted all option even after the affair - my ex still decided he wanted out. He lead God's sheep astray and he was the adulterer in the marriage. He broke the pact. I actually felt peace about it when it all went down. So thank you to those that agreed in that sense. As far as the premarital sex Again, perhaps I am naive but wasn't fornication and sexual immortality that of the Old Testament I did wait until marriage because to me sexual purity was sacred and I wanted to obey God.

Second chances: dating a divorcé

I feel cheated now kind of. I guess I want to follow God with all my heart but I can't help but be scared. I really thought he was the one. He was a God fearing man, born again in the waters. We placed our entire dating life and married life in God's hands. We planned our lives with God's guidance. How do I know the next God fearing man is not going to do me wrong Put yourself in my shoes.

dating while going through divorce | Christian Forums

That intimacy that one has with Christ, you weren't able to share that with your husband because he was out sharing it with someone else Perhaps one of the most difficult Scriptures dealing with divorce or separation is found in 1 Corinthians 7: But if she does leave him, let her remain single or else go back to him. And the husband must not leave the wife. This clearly states that those who are divorced or separated, unless "scripturally released," should not remarry, but instead, seek restoration. There would be fewer divorces without cause and more reconciliations. Get Spirit-filled content delivered right to your inbox!

Click here to subscribe to our newsletter. A brother or a sister is not bound in such cases. God has called us to peace. Even though a spouse's actions may resemble that of an unbeliever because they choose to leave, hard questions need to be asked. In this case, the spouse leaves because the environment is unbearable, not because they are an unbeliever. The other spouse is not scripturally released in this case.

First Corinthians seems to indicate that the other is released. Blatant disrespect, financial irresponsibility and pornography can also drive a spouse away. Clearly understand that I'm not advocating separation, divorce or remaining in an abusive relationship, nor am I saying that if you are currently separated, that divorce become an option because better opportunities await you.

God hates divorce and anyone who has been there knows why. This article is not designed to be a one-size-fits-all approach. There are too many variables to address every situation. I believe, first and foremost, in reconciliation and restoration, but these are not always options. That's why a personal relationship with Jesus and obedience to God's Word is profoundly important.

Through that relationship you will be able to make the right decision.


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  • It won't be easy because lives have been damaged, dreams destroyed and promises broken, but God continually redeems us through His forgiveness. God desires that we know His will and follow His lead in spite of detours.

    Christians and Divorce: Five Keys to Successful Dating After Divorce

    One of the biggest obstacles when considering restoration or seeking direction, is to become involved in another relationship soon after the divorce or separation. This severely hinders any chance of reconciliation, as well as the ability to follow God's lead. But it is impossible for me to say that this conduct is all right. A minister of God must teach what is in the Bible; yet the teaching must be tempered with the biblical understanding of God's love.

    It is very difficult to make hard and fast rules. Does one, for example, tell a three-times-divorced man to go back to his previous mate? What if the previous mate is now remarried?

    Is it right to ask the remarried couple to make a second divorce and break up a second home? The basic rule is that divorce and remarriage are not permitted, except for adultery or desertion, and that is the rule the church should stick to. Young people should be made aware that marriage is for life - for keeps - and not something to be entered into and then gotten out of whenever one feels like it. However, given the appalling state of marriage in the modern world, I feel that the church should use its power of "binding and loosing" see Matthew In other words, the church should and I personally would say that what happened in your past life is covered by the blood of Christ.

    Enjoy your present marriage and live in it to the glory of God without recrimination.

    Christian Singles Talk Dating Online, Sex & Marriage, and Divorce

    However, for Christians who have divorced after being born again for reasons other than adultery or desertion, I believe they should either be reconciled to their Christian mates or remain unmarried. Finally, in these complex personal matters I recommend prayer, study of the Bible, and that you counsel with a wise and godly pastor in you own community. Is Cruelty Grounds for Divorce? I do not think mental cruelty is grounds for divorce if mental cruelty concerns the way a mate twists the toothpaste tube or hangs stockings in the bathroom. That type of mental cruelty has been defined in so many different contexts it has no meaning.

    However, I do think physical brutality and abuse, and mental abuse of a nature that endangers the person's mind or body, are clearly grounds for divorce.